What Defines a Man?

I am tired of being told what a “man” is.

This blog post might quickly turn into a rant. Therefore, let me first apologize if it does, because it is not my intension. My hope is to draw attention to the recent shift in advertising by companies such as Dr. Pepper and Miller, who are now strongly marketing to “men.”

In order to appeal to men, these companies have drawn a line in the sand and declared that certain actions, likes and dislikes, purchases, products, and/or fashion styles are not manly. These companies then ask their audience to “man-up,” as the Miller ads state, and purchase their [the company’s] product. These advertisements, based on fictitious assumptions of what manhood should be, are riddled with false views of what communicates a person’s masculinity.

Focusing on the latter first, a person’s masculinity is often based in culture. The culture one is raised in communicates certain expectations regarding who a man should be. If a man does not meet these cultural expectations, he is deemed not manly, feminine, or even sometimes “gay.” Once someone has been called these things, he is left with two choices, trying to fit into the cultural expectation of manhood that is being pushed onto him, or being stuck in the non-manly camp. The question I ask is, how can one determine if a male is “manly” or not?

This brings us to the subsequent assumption of these advertisements, what communicates a person’s masculinity. The culture of the United States has bought into the idea that one’s identity lies in the motto, “you are what you consume,” or put on your body, or what you do with your body, or the shape of your body. Current culture tells people that they are what others perceive them to be.

Take the advertisement below for instance. The “unmanly guy” in the commercial is carrying a bag. It is this bag that communicates his unmanliness, not who he is.

Miller Lite


Dr. Pepper


Even these commercials realize that culture believes that what people put on their bodies helps to define them, which is why these advertisements work. Men are “manly” when they drink Miller Lite or when they drink Dr. Pepper 10, but not when they drink that “other lite beer” or “lady drink.”

Has identity formation really become so fluid a process that people, including me, are what they do, drink, or wear?

As Christians, our identities do not come from our culture or “world.” That is why many New Testament writers, such as Peter, refer to Christians as “aliens” or “foreigners” (1 Peter 2:11-12). There is a difference between those who follow Christ and those who do not. This difference finds its roots in where our identities derive themselves. As those who are “rooted in Christ,” we derive our identities from the one whom we are rooted in, Christ.

Even within the 1st century church, there were people who wanted to define others by what their body looked like or by what they ate. The Judaizers demanded that all Gentiles be circumcised, acting as a bodily marker, to become Christ followers. Yet, Paul argued that circumcision does not define a Christian; it is the “circumcision of the heart” and what a person is “rooted in” that makes him or her a Jesus follower (Romans 2:29).

If we find our identities in Christ, shouldn’t our definition of manhood also be found in him?

Jesus was the complete revelation of God to humanity (John 1:18). He not only reveals God to us, but he also reveals that we are created to be God’s image. If you want to know what a man looks like, look at Jesus, who was homeless, who gave up everything to serve, who cried, who turned over tables, and who died on a cross. That is what a man is. What you drink, what you wear, what you do or act like does not define you as a man. God defines you as a man.